


The Confidant

by Brorifles (Kyloisadisneyprincess)



Series: The Correspondent Series [3]
Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-24
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-05-27 15:24:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15027536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyloisadisneyprincess/pseuds/Brorifles
Summary: Once again separated and still uncertain of their own feelings Zeb and Kallus continue to aid in the fight to liberate Lothal. The unspoken and complex nature of thier relationship both protects and hinders them as they strugle not to lose faith in themselves, each other, and the ongoing rebelion.





	1. Rebel Assault and Jedi knight

“Are you sure these explosives are strong enough?” Zeb asks.

Yeah, they’ll do the trick, why?” Sabine answers 

“It’s just that these gun towers look a lot bigger up close.” He stares up to the platform above. It’s unlikely that he could scale on of these. And use it too take out the rest of the turrets in the event that something goes wrong. Zeb hopes this works. 

Ezra checks in with Ryder’s team, who are already waiting at the rendezvous point. One last tower to go. Sabine, Kannan and Ezra run off to pick up the speakers as he places the last charge.

“Ya, good?” Ezra asks as he pulls up

“Last one.” Zeb replies. 

“Alright, Hop on!”

“That’s not how this works.” Zeb wonders when Ezra had become more of a nuisance or he himself has become more agitated.  Zeb is nervous, he hopes this will be this will be the battle that sends them back to yavin base victorious and yet he has so little control of how this all will play out.

“Hey!” Ezra yelps as Zeb lifts him by the collar into the passengers space on the back of the bike.

“Hop on…” He murmurs.

\----

At the rendezvous point It’s like they're gathering to watch Fireworks.

“We should be seeing them any minute now!” Ezra announces.

“There! Look! Here they come!” Sabine adds her scope picking up on the movement before the naked eye can. Pins of light streak downwards toward Lothal city. But there is no formation or guns firing on the factory.  
“What are those?’ Zeb asks, the pit of his stomach curling.

“Is that…?” Ezra begins in disbelief.

“The entire attack force.” Sabine finishes for him.

This had seemed like an easy mision from down here. Zeb knows that it is anything but. 

“We’ve got gunships incoming!” Sabine calls out. And it helps to shake off the shock.

Kannan is desperately trying to reach Hera over the comm as the team begins to load up.

“We have to go before they spot us” Ryder says.

“Kannan Let’s go.” Zeb adds. He can’t imagine the grief. The instant before atolon was attacked he hadn’t known he would fall in love with Kallus the way he has now. But he did know that watching everything you hoped on flicker and turn to dust could crush a man. Especially, when left with no way to help.

“We will find her Kannan. I promise.” Ezra comforts, and It gives Zeb just enough hope because it sounds like the kid believes it.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s one thing to write the words, it’s another to make himself believe them.  Kallus re-reads the sentence he’s written.

_ Zeb, I love you and I’ll see you soon. _

There is no news yet of how General Syndulla’s bombing run went. No news from the ground forces on lothal either. Kallus feels stuck. There’s only so many recommendations he can make and imperial secrets he can share before his days start to feel like one endless meeting.  _ For the love of Kriff I just want to punch in the face whatever is keeping you from me. _ He adds. It’s not the most elegant of his letters but it’s how he feels. 

He wonders if this is selfish, he doesn’t intend for Zeb to ever see these notes. They are more for himself than anything. Kallus feels he should be doing something to prove his love for Zeb. But how does one earn love when the item of affection is absent?

_ I think always of you and the dangers you face. ( and I want to punch the living shit out of them but we’ve already covered that.) _

Kallus sits back and laughs at himself,  _ I’m doing a great job aren’t I? _

_ I have to do this, if I don’t and I never see you again… _ What? Zeb’s memory will be lost forever? Kallus will be haunted by his ghost and destined to never love again. No, there is no superstition in this Kallus is a logical human being.

_ I just need you to come back safe.  _ He finishes. All of this, for completely unselfish reasons. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’m going back.” Kannan says, stopping suddenly. Quickly everyone else brings their speeders to a halt. “I have to do this.” 

“I understand.”  Ezra answers. “We’ll see you back at base.” Zeb is surprised at his maturity.

“Ezra we should…” Sabine argues

“If anyone can save Hera he can.” Ezra says firmly “Let’s go.”

Zeb hated leaving Hera and Kannan behind. But there was a time when it was just them and Chopper. He supposes they should be able to look after themselves.

But Ezra and his reaction? Zeb could say he was a mystery, Only, he knows too well what it’s like to lose everything. How long had the kid searched the streets for his parents before giving up? This war has made everyone desperate, compelled to seek out whatever shred of hope was left. After all the Empire can take anything from anyone.

They were all clinging to something. Zeb wanted his something to be Kallus. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Word on General Syndulla’s attack should have come in by now.  And Kallus was done with asking politely. It seems that the entire Lothal operation has been swept under the rug And the personel the brought from Attolon dispersed to aid the greater cause. Kallus knows he should, that there was a time he did believe in putting the needs of the many first. But this feels too much like how the empire kept their people in the dark. 

It’s easy to corner the transmissions personnel. Kallus could just hack in and find the information he needs to clear his mind but he is aware that people know about his past and it wouldn’t take much for him to lose favor with high command.  He is surprised to find that there are no answers. No transmissions have been received from lothal.

But, Kallus can count on the fact that the bombing force hasn’t returned. It’s the only hard evidence he had. But that didn’t mean ground forces hadn’t fared better, were at least alive. 

_ Zeb, I hope you are well.  _  Kallus begins to write. But he quickly shreds the paper before turning in for the night.

\------

Kallus stands in the center of a circle of of orange light. At the edge of the circle where the shadows start to bleed in is Zeb. The warm oppressive light and shadow tinges his fur red and muddy. Instinctually he wants to reach out. But instead of moving forward he spins and finds that he is surrounded by Zeb’s. 

The one he faces now opens his mouth but then looks away. He tries another and another, each of them in turn like locked doors. Some turn their backs, sneer, and push him away. Until one reaches out to him. Kallus is shaking, aware that all eyes are watching them now, but still too desperate to care. 

When he reaches the edge of the circle. Zeb rests a hand on his shoulder and the whispers begin. They say he gave up, they list the people he has killed, they voice the doubts he has about the rebellion and every hateful Xenophobic secret he still harbours. And the chanting turns Zeb’s gentle hand to a death grip around his throat.  

_ No. no  _ he gasps _ I want to be so much more than this, I know I am wrong and I will find a way to change with or without you!  _ He kicks at this phantom Zeb and all the others that are closing in and finds them turning to shreds of paper. He drowns in them despite his victory.

\-----

Kallus falls out of bed scrambling to find the bits of paper he discarded earlier. He pieces them back together and hopes that the ghosts will let him sleep.

_________________________________________________________________________

The circular platform on Ezra’s tower provides the perfect spot to search the force for Hera. Or so Zeb’s been told. He’s not quite sure if the force gets interference or works on the basis of magical frequency waves, or if Ezra’s just decided that this is a good spot.  Either way this seems like a long shot and Zeb is getting impatient. 

Zeb doesn’t understand why Kannan isn’t here. He’s glad that Ezra asked him to help with the plan to rescue Hera. It just seems like Kannan should be the one to do this. He is Hera’s knight in shining armor after all. It scares him a little. If Kallus were the one captured Zeb would have been knocking at the empire’s door with a thermal detonator hours ago. But maybe that’s why Kannan is holding back now. Going in armed with rage and nothing but your undying love as backup does seem like a pretty stupid idea. 

Ezra’s hand is outstretched toward Lothal city. The massive Imperial dome overtakes its architecture. There are thousands more cities like this, thousands more prisoners with loved ones grasping at the air in search of them. It seems hopeless.

“Anything?” asks finally breaking. This earns him a push and a firm shushing from Sabine. 

“I know where she is.” Ezra says “In the dome, in Governor Pryce’s office.”

In a flash Sabine is providing the layout, but even if they know where Hera is there are still multiple layers of defense between them and her.

“How do we get past all the patrols towers and gun turrets? It’s not like we can just fly in.” Zeb questions. 

“That's exactly what we do! On gliders.” Ezra fires back 

“I wasn’t trying to give you an idea” Zeb replies he wishes Ezra’s plans weren’t always so impulsive.

“No Ezra’s right the empire is equipped to counter sophisticated weaponry and targets. They won't be looking for something low tech like a simple glider.” Sabine backs him up.

“Hm, I don't know if we get spotted we’re at a pretty big disadvantage.” Zeb says.

“No, we’ll just look like loth-bats.” Ezra argues.

Chopper chimes in “Like what?”

“Here,” Ezra adds passing Zeb the scope “Look towards the south entrance where the garbage chute is. I bet we can glide right past them and never be noticed.”

“Alright,” Zeb relents “so where do we get these gliders?”  
“Easy, we make them.” Sabine says her smile tells that she is going to enjoy this.

\--------

Working on the gliders, having something to do with his hands is good. Zeb is nervous, more nervous than he would like to admit. They are outnumbered and outgunned in a way they have never been before. There is no help coming and no escape.  Even if they do rescue Hera all they have to look forward to is dying together. But this is a fact better left unsaid.

“Ah, finished.” Sabine says giving a wing on last spray of paint

“How can you tell?” Zeb jokes with her. It’s half hearted. This could be the end for them.

Despite Sabines talents the gliders had all been painted a uniform shade of gray. Better to blend in with the local loth-bats

“What’s the matter?” Kannan asks

“It’s probably good you cant see this flying contraption.” Zeb admits. Kannan rests his hand on Zeb’s shoulder “This is one of those times Im glad the force is with you.”

Zeb guesses he’s lucky to be too heavy and too noticable for this stealth mission. But it makes his stomach chun to have to send them off. He pushes the speeder bike for all that its worth to get the gliders in the air and Chop releases the cable to set them free.

“Go get her, bring her back” Zeb calls, fist raised toward the sky as they, fly into the sunset. He turns the speeder they used for launch back towards base. But there’s nothing for him there.

“Hey Chopper, Why do you think Kannan and Hera love eachother so much? He asks out of curiosity. Droids have a funny way of looking at things.

“When a meat bag and another meat bag see each other their slimey brains make this special sauce…”

“OK! No thanks Chopp that’s not what I meant.”

“But really…”

“No Chopp no biology lessons needed here!”

“Really I think, It’s almost like how when Hera found me.” Chopp continues anyway his tone serious, ” It was the right time and place and Kannan needed her and she needed him. They just decided to never let go.”

“And they say droids can’t be poets!” Zeb rolls his eyes. “Does it really seem that simple to your rusty circuits?”

“Uh, Yeah.” Chopper says unabashed. “But there’s also this special slime..”

“Chopp!”


	2. Dume

Kallus waits. Nothing has been decided about the fate of Lothal because of conflicting reports. Outgoing transmissions indicate and Imperial victory. While incoming messages suggest a loss. What could have caused such a confusion? Working with Thrawn and Pryce had been like holding a snake with two heads but never had they disagreed so completely.

But it was easy to get them tangled. And It was no less easy for the talking heads of the rebellion to shoot off in seven different directions, none of them pointing toward Lothal. Anything could have gone wrong. There was no way to calculate the risk, so continuing to aid Lothal was considered unjustifiably risky. 

Kallus hated that verdict. If there was one reason the Rebellion was better than the empire it was because they took risks. Risks based on hope, comradery and all those things Kallus had never seen in action before. He hated to think he had left one war machine just to become an expendible piece in another. 

When he was compromised Ghost crew had tried to rescue him, not use him up untill he was no longer useful. Kallus had made that decision, and he would never know if it had ended up costing the rebels more than it had saved them. He hated giving up like this. He hated having doubts. Zeb was alive. Wasn’t he? For as long as he had hunted the Ghost nothing could touch them. Thrawn and Pryce would be no different, the had to be. Kallus needed to see Zeb again.

Kallus resists the urge to sweep all of his belongings off of his desk and  just start throwing shit. It won’t help him. Zeb is alive. Isn’t he?

_____________________________________________________________________

 

Zeb waves in the imperial copter. Now that they were all back together again they could figure out how to deal the empire a real blow and then get off this rock. Back to the rebellion, back to Kallus. Chopper was right, they had each other, they had their guts. They’d find a way to make it out of this together. 

But hope has a funny way of leaving you out to dry doesn’t it. 

Sabine sets the copter down heavy and chucks her flight helmet out of the cockpit.

“Sabine? What’s wrong? Sabine!” Zeb tries to get an answer out of her but she’d brushing by, using an elbow to shield her face, forearm shrugging off tears with disgust. Hera and Ezra exit the troop compartment. Hera’s posture is broken and she wanders off aimlessly. Chopper rolls along after. 

Ezra. Ezra is softer, no less broken than Sabine and Hera, but he doesn’t try to run or lash out like a wounded animal. It’s something Zeb can work with.

“Alright kid, what’s going on? Zeb asks. He grips Ezra by both shoulders and feels the tension release from Ezra’s body when he finally speaks.

“Kannan’s gone.” His eyebrows knit upwards as if he’s just confused himself.

“What do you mean gone? Like captured?” the weight of the reality has shifted to Zeb and he is searching for a way to shake it off.

“No! He’s gone.” Ezra yells frustration then despair making him shake in Zeb’s grasp. Zeb doesn’t know what more to do than to pull Ezra close.

\--

The announcement is surreal. Kannan is dead and those Imps are celebrating like they’ve buried all of them. Kannan was his friend and people are planning to all but dance on his grave. Kannan’s nonexistent grave for his nonexistent body, eaten up into ashes, indiscernible from the rest of this kriffing wasteland. It was lassan all over again. But Zeb can’t think about that. All he sees is red and all he wants to feel is a stormtrooper helmet against his fist. Maybe even in his fist. Would it be possible to just take both his hands and squeeze? Squeeze until all of the dirty lies leaked out? Rinse, repeat.

“I’m gonna go add some fireworks to their celebration” Sabine says. And it sounds good. They’ve always been on the same murderous wavelength. 

“Count me in”

\--

Sabine didn’t want to deal with this right now. And she only let Zeb tag along because she new he wouldn’t press her about her feelings. She’d work it out. She’d work it out with the overheating barrels of her blasters and a hurricane of explosives.

They stop on a ridge overlooking the main causeway into lothal city. She wants to go in there firing, but not blind. It had to hurt. She had to make it count for Kannan. The first thing she notices is how many people there are; too many. They had felt outnumbered before but seeing is believing

“What do you see?” Zeb asks.

“Well, The parade has started, but look how many people there are, how much the empire’s grown.”

“Isn’t that why we’re here? To reduce their numbers?” Zeb isn’t so naive to think that the gray masses trudging along the streets of Lothal are the empire. At one time he did, but now he knew more.

“We couldn’t beat them without the help of the rebel alliance, and there are so few of us left, how can we beat them now.” Sabine leaves the rest unsaid. They could thin out their numbers but not without killing off innocents too, not without resorting to mas explosions, reckless killing. It’s in Sabine’s past. Zeb knows she’s thinking of it. He refuses see it in her future. He grumbles. 

“You don’t see anything strange about the city?”

“Eh, besides the refinery being on fire?”

“The factories aren’t belching smoke. When’s the last time you saw them shut down?”

“Never, but that’s probably just because of the parade.”

“The Empire doesn’t give days off, Sabine.” Zeb relishes in coming to the conclusion before her. They still need to prove it of course. But Zeb bets that those people down there are at this little imperial parade with just about as much excitement as they take to their jobs.

“Huh, now that is interesting.” Sabine admits.

 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

“Well, don’t you look happy to be here” Rex says as he sits down across from Kallus. The man looked like he hadn’t been sleeping. And it was something if you managed to get the busiest of senators in the rebelion to notice your deteriorating state. Damn lookers always had to bring the drama.

“Rex” Kallus responds barely a flicker of his eyes upwards, hunched over a cup of caf.

_ Damn you Zeb,  _ Rex thinks, _ for making me promise to look out for this (baby) while you have all the fun. _

“It’s good to see your shit looking face too.” He fires back. Kallus wasn’t much of a pretty boy right now.

“Well, at least it’s unique.” Kallus retorts. 

_ Ok, low blow. At least as low as you are.  _ Rex thinks, he’s not too offended it's a joke he made himself. The last time he used that one was…  _ Ah... _

“You heard that.” Rex says, remembering back to the day they sent the Ghost off on her mission.

“Yes and I happen to like Zeb’s very unique face.” Kallus says gripping the mug a little harder between his hands.

“Oh, so that’s what this is about.” Rex leans in

“What?” Kallus asks. Too tired to put on his stoic innocent face .

“The left over rations, the double, triple shifts.Your slipping Kal” Rex says, keeping his voice low.

“The empire didn’t have things set up this cushy for us. I’m fine. Finally finding a routine.”

“A work yourself to death routine?”

“Kriff, No.”

“Kriffing yes, and you know it.” Rex says. “Look I got some transmissions here for your review. But I can’t giving them to you until you put something in your gut that isn’t sugary caf and you take a nap.”  Rex holds his hands up like there’s nothing else for it and has the nerve to look smug.

\--

Kallus hasn’t managed to sleep more than an hour at a time since the last dream. He wakes at thalos of red images threatening to encroach on the darkness. He’s taken to walking in between periods of drifting off sitting up, still dressed, boots on. His favorite places to wander are the lake to watch the salamanders dart under the cool clear water, and the hanger to stroke his fingers across the Ghost’s hull. He cannot bring himself to venture inside where it still smells like Zeb, like he’s been living there all along. Like he’s living at all.

Maybe, if he abstains, from the dreams from the ghost, Zeb will come back. Maybe if he works hard enough the universe will grant him this in advance. He swears he’ll be good. He’ll think and not follow blind. 

Kallus looks down at the ration bar on his tray and his stomach turns. He can get that down right? 

“Oh, come on.” Rex sighs. If he’s said anything other than his ultimatum Kallus hasn’t heard him. “Zeb’s got to be bigger than that.” 

Kallus can’t decide to laugh or cry. 

Rex leads him back to the ghost after they finish lunch. He’s being blackmailed so he guesses it doesn’t count against him to go in.  Maybe this is what he needs. 

__________________________________________________________________

They sneak up on a scout trooper alone on the causeway, without a buddy, stupid. It’s so easy to punch someone’s lights out when they are looking so far away.

“Ha, I needed that” Zeb says cracking his knuckles.

Sabine taps into the imperial network and confirms the factory shut down. The empire had lost the factory and the parade was just a flashy cover-up. Time to get even. They set their trap and wait. Soon there are more Imps flocking to the unconscious scout. Zeb and Sabine watch them investigate from the ridge. A trooper pulls out the splicing device and Boom!

“Well, That was fast.” Sabine says

“You wanted to send a message.” Zeb answers. They should get going.

“I can do better than… Wait.” Sabine pauses checking out the explosion’s aftermath through her scope. “What is that?”

“What is what? Let me see.” Zeb takes the scope. “Uhg, it looks like a baby rancor.”

“Wait a minute, Ezra told us about that thing.”

“Right! I remember now. When we were recovering the hyperdrive that thing came sniffling over to us.” Zeb takes another look. ”Ah! It looked right at me!”

“Did it see you?”

“I dont know!”

“Well look and see!”

“I dont want too! it got creepy eyes!”

“Oh, give me those.” Sabine says snatching the scopes back. “Oh boy, it’s coming this way.”

“What!? Let me see”

“Uhg, your right and the closer it gets the uglier it gets. But at least its alone.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean we can even the score. They took kannan from us. Wwe take something from them”

“I agree with you. Only because we cant let it track us back to base. Now, since we outnumber it let’s use that to our advantage”

They speed away to find cover and wait. Is an unfair fight still unfair if you let your opponent know? Zeb lures the creature into the rocky outcropping before Sabine drops in from behind. 

“We’re not in the mood for a fair fight today.” She says. 

“Neither am I.” With that the creature activates a stealth field and disappears. 

_ No, still unfair. _ Sabine thinks. They struggle blind until she can plant one of her paint bombs on it. They’re in too close quarters for the real thing. Zeb takes it from there and he’s brutal. The way things are looking she should have used the real detinator. They will all be painted in blood at this rate.

“Zeb! Stop!” Sabine moves to get in between him and their target. “Zeb! Zeb, Stop.”

\--

“I thought you wanted to get even.” Zeb says more than asks. He’s panting and feels ashamed when the words come out as almost a sob.

“Yes, but this isn’t how we do it” Sabine reminds him. There was a time when Zeb had fantasized about doing this to Kallus; lay him out and just punch until there was nothing left. He’s scared to admit it.

“Well what are we gonna do with him now” He asks instead. 

“I’ve got an Idea.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to push these out quick because damn if August did not sneak up on me quick! So, if you see any huge grammar problems feel free to let me know.

Zeb and Sabine report back. The heaviness of the grief they both feel hasn’t lessened but it feels more bearable now.  Knowing that they’d won despite their loss was invigorating. Knowing that they could do this together as a family, without losing themselves was comforting. They have to tell Hera. They shouldn’t have left her to grieve on her own.

As if on cue chopper rolls out of the cave. Hera hadn’t been alone. Zeb guesses it was for the best that chopper be the one to comfort her. If chopper and Zeb had been together, there’s no telling where they would have stopped 

“I’m only telling you because your a little murder bot.” Zeb says. “But I almost killed a man with my bare hands today. I thought that doing it would get all my feelings out.” Zeb pauses. “I’ve thought about killing Kallus that way, and I’d be short a friend if I had.” 

“You are a dumb hairless wookie.” Chopper whirls. 

“I know, Sometimes I think that the galaxy would solve itself out if everyone just did everything they could to save what they love. But then some sicko’s gotta love the murder. I’m one of those sicko’s. I’m the problem. It’s me.” 

Chopper beeps a negative. “We all grow.” He tweedles sweetly. Zeb worries for a second that Kannan’s death has made him soft.

“Yeah? Keep telling yourself that. You’ll be the height of a fresher in no time.”

Chopp’s protest is colorful and Zeb knows that their going to be alright.

\--

When Ezra shows up Zeb knows their circle is complete. Well, as complete as it can be given the circumstance. Zeb has always been sceptic about the force but if Ezra needs help and Hera wants this for Kannan he’ll go. Even on one of these stinking lothwolves.

“Hello, My name is Zeb.” he says slowly, uncertain.

“Zeb! those ones don’t talk.”

“How do you know? It talks! With its eyes.” Zeb is thoroughly sure it wants to eat him.

They take off into Lothal’s tall grass and before long it begins. The sensation of diving is strong its the same kind of tripp that Zeb felt when they woke up at their new base. Only this time Zeb swears he hears Kallus’s voice.

_______________________________________________________________

Kallus thankfully does not dream of Zeb as he sleeps on the ghost. The closeness of the bunk and the comfort of Zeb’s scent is enough to lull him into a dreamless sleep. He wakes a few hours later to Rex opening the Ghost’s ramp. 

“Rise and shine sleeping beauty!” Rex calls. “I got your transmissions for review and I can’t keep Senator Mothma waiting forever.”

Kallus sits up and looks around the bunk blearily. Ezra’s creepy painted helmets greet him. Sabine’s mural of the bunk incident makes him smile sadly. He misses Zeb. Whatever the outcome on Lothal, Kallus has to accept that he is connected to him indefinitely. Lack of mariage vows be damned. 

Kallus decided to head off Rex in the common area. He drags his blanket with him , draping it over his head and shoulders like a child. 

“Here ya go.” Rex says tossing the data pad onto the table. “Sleep well?”

“Yes, thank you.” Kallus answers moving to sit. The rest has mellowed him out and now he’s ready to get back to work. 

“You know, you could just move in here.” Rex says. “No one would care. Except the higher ups that keep trying to lease her out. Would hate for Hera to get back and her baby not be here.”

“What, you applying to be my roommate?”

“If it keeps you from pulling these stunts.” Rex says. Kallus considers him. “Zeb’s my friend too, and I made a promise not to let the rebellion rough you up too much while he’s gone.”

“Did you?” Kallus says pointedly keeping his eyes on the tablet. 

“Kriffing Corusanti snob,” Rex mutters under his breath.

Kallus looks up. “I’d like that.” he admits. Rex isn’t a liar and he’s not much one for tact either. Kallus knows he won’t see eye to eye with command. “So how do we get them to send us to Lothal?”

_______________________________________________________________

Ezra and Sabine beg. It’s one thing to send them in in disguise to have a look around, It’s another when the emperor is involved Zeb understands why she wants to fall back. The loss of Kannan is fresh in all of their minds. They can’t bear to lose more family. And yet this is important. Force wolf wizardry sent them here on Kannan’s behalf.

“Hera, remember why we came.” Zeb reminds. He keeps his voice as gentle as possible. They have to take risks if they are going to succeed.

“Go, we’ll keep watch” Hera relents, an impossible calm comes over her. “But I want you both out of there if I give the order.”

“Absolutely,” Sabine confirms.

“Thanks Hera. We’ll be carefull.” Ezra promises.

“They’ll be fine.” Zeb comforts

“I used to always believe that.” 

They wait, keeping tabs on the pair of scout troopers as they move through the camp. Sabine has been detained but not found out. Ezra is missing. 

“I think the paintings moved.” Hera admits before Zeb demands the scope. He hopes Hera isn’t slipping but at the same time he’s had enough magical mumbo jumbo for today. Sabine’s helmet is off and the base spirals into lock down.

_________________________________________________________________

There are a few intercepted transmissions from Alderaan in the batch, A few more from the shipyards on Corellia. Those had been easy to sort through for threats. Senator Organa would have to be more careful with his opinions if he didn’t want something terrible to befall his planet. 

Kallus is afraid to bring himself to review the last dispatch from Coruscant to Lothal but he does it. It hints at the death of a longstanding insurgent, one from ghost crew. It also confirms General Syndula’s rescue. Neither Ezra or Sabine are old enough for their live to be considered ‘longstanding’ and no one ever cares to count droids. That left Kanan and Zeb. Kanan was Jedi, had survived the clone war, the great purge, and whatever tragedy took his eyes. There was no way Kanan had died during a rescue mission against someone as feeble and unimaginative as Pryce.

Zeb was dead. Kallus tries to bite back his sob. He couldn’t believe it, didn’t want it to be true. But he’d known long before this confirmation. He would make them pay.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The temple begins crumbling before the make their escape. There isn’t much Zeb can do except try to keep everyone on board the construction vehicle. Chopper’s pushing the rig for all that it’s worth. For now they were together and whole. All Zeb can do is watch over Ezra and try to keep the rest of his family safe.

“If this is what you and Kanan used to do on your Jedi missions, you can keep it.” Zeb says as soon as Ezra groans awake. Zeb had know they were in trouble from the moment he  saw the painting Ezra activated.The son’s closing gesture was that of a warrior. Zeb had used the same hand over closed fist goodbye when he left Kallus on the ice moon. It’s not something that was used without a sense of finality.  Zeb suspected he was sending Kallus off for good that day. And true to tradition once they had gotten clear they had found that the temple was entirely gone. For a moment Zeb thought they would be gone with it.

But they are here. 

\--

Rex finds Kallus watching the U-wing land. Hera’s onboard. Despite the rebellion’s refusal to help, she’s back. And Kallus is glad of it. With most of Rex’s contacts dating back to the clone war and his own burned when he switched sides, they had come up pretty empty handed. They were still in need of a plan and every plan needed a strong leader. 

Something is off with Hera when she exits the ship. But still she comes confidently over to them. 

“It’s good to see you two.” She says. “If you’re willing, it’s time that the ghost returns to Lothal.” 

“Of course, We’re with you Sir.” Rex answers formally. 

“Agreed.” Kallus adds. He had hoped that she would have something, anything to tell him. 

“I assume you’ve heard about Kanan?” Hera asks. This is what’s changed. Hera’s posture a little stooped, curled in on herself. Rex is quicker on the uptake than him.

“Yes general, I’m sorry for your loss.” he answers. Kallus’s head is spinning.

“Thank you,” Hera says, it’s like an echo. Kallus notices her forcible straighten herself out and stand tall. He notices because it’s what he has been having to do. “Now, I need to stop by medical. Do the preflight check and ready the Ghost for take off.”

“Yes Sir.” Rex responds as Hera whisks herself away.

\--

“Kanan is dead.” Rex says. No attempt to hide that he’s reeling. And kriff Kallus feels shitty for saying it, as if he’s somehow hot potatoed Hera his grief. 

“Zeb is alive.”


	4. Chapter 4

This Isn’t the plan Kallus expected. And the absurdities of it keep growing but he’d be damned if a little ingenuity kept him from seeing Zeb. Rex and Kallus pilot the ship to Seelos, another of Hera’s surprising orders. He’d thought she would want to be at the helm of her ship after being away so long. Well, He’d thought that until he heard her heaving in the fresher, he  wavers on saying something to Rex about it. But he figures that there is more than one way to be sick with grief. 

They land atop a walker retrofitted with a small landing pad. Kallus knew the clones he had fought against here had ended up with one. He just never expected to see it again. Inside the absurdities continue. Two veteran clones, a bounty hunter, an ugnaught and Hondo Ohnaka wait for them. They’re a ragtag bunch but no less loyal to Ezra for it. Kallus breaks the argumentative banter.

“I think it’s time we discuss the mission.”

And the plan only get worse. Ezra coms, they have to push the time table up and Hondo has yet to reveal his plan for getting across the blockade. 

“We just received a transmission from chopper, they’re under attack.” Rex adds.

The tension is high as they wait to run the blockade, They can’t risk being caught but they can’t risk being to late.  And hondo’s spectacular addition to the plan is to wait in a hyperspace lane for a ship that might tear them apart. 

Surprisingly, It works.

“As soon as we get through the atmosphere I’ll give Ezra the signal.” Hera says.

She’s as eager as Kallus is to be reunited with the rest of the crew and end this for Lothal.

________________________________________________________________

“Zeb! They’re coming!” Ezra calls.

Zeb can hear the whine of their engines as they make their approach. This has to look good, and they need to thin out imperial numbers enough for the second wave to over power them. Zeb sees Ryder hang back and gives him a nod. This half trained group of civilian rebels are all that’s left of Ryder’s people and he’s trusting Zeb to lead and look out for them. Sabine takes to the sky while Ezra handles the group of troopers that snuck in from behind. 

Before He knows it the ore crawler was going down and they are greeted by their friends kneeling with blasters to their heads. It’s up to Ryder now to play for time. 

They don’t need much. The ghost picks off the transports, stranding Pryce. And the battle begins anew. Zeb catches a glimpse of Kallus’s hair as he and the clones exit, laying down enough fire for the rest of them to dash for cover and new weapons.  

They fall back to the cave to wait for the third and final wave. And Zeb knows that it’s childish to search for Kallus in the darkness, but still he goes around patting h eads under the guise of taking count until he finds him. 

They hang back a little after everyone else charges out of the cave. 

“I’m glad you’re here.” Zeb says pressing his lips to the crown of Kallus’s head. 

“Me too” Kallus answers.”This is the first time, we are fighting on the same side.”

“Then we better not miss the fight.” Zeb says. Kallus can hear his grin.

With the wolves in action there is not much to be done. But still Zeb enjoys the victory with Kallus by his side. The troopers surrender easily. 

“I’d drop Your weapons if I were you.”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Amidst the base’s hurried packing, Kallus keeps hoping for a moment alone with Zeb. Their eyes keep catching on eachother like thorns. But always there is something else to do, some other place they are needed. Until finally Kallus backs into Zeb’s broad chest. The stolen gear he was carrying tumble to the ground and Kallus couldn't care less.

“Could almost think you are avoiding me.” Zeb gruffs as Kallus turns to face him.

“No, never, I…” Kallus stills before pulling Zeb down into a kiss. He tries to catch his breath when they are done, still embracing.  “I missed you so much.”

Zeb hums and his eyes almost slip closed His hands rub over Kallus’s back before clamping down possessively. His hum turns to a low growl, soft eyes turn to a glare.

“How disgusting.” Price says.Kallus tenses in his arms. “You turned into a traitor for that thing.” Zeb very nearly lets out a roar “Vicious beast.” She spits back. “Is one of these whelps your child?” she adds for insult. The loth-wolves guarding her seem no more impressed than Zeb, moving in to crowd her further. 

“Zeb, she’s not worth it and we need her.” Kallus says trying to soothe Zeb by pressing his weight back into him and locking his arms more tightly around his middle. It wasn’t right. It was cruel that they couldn’t have revenge and liberation for Lothal. But Kallus knew which Zeb would choose. And he has no right to be proud but he is. 

Zeb is being humiliated for being no more than himself. In a few minutes he’ll be put in cuffs like a prisoner. The only space that can be spared for him in a galaxy ruled by the empire. The wrongness of it is glaring. Zeb is so much more noble and gentle than any other person Kallus has ever met. But this is the lot ascribed to him. Kallus will see it change.

“It’s time to get going.” Ryder says pulling Pryce up by the arm. She tries to elbow him. “Give me a hand here Kallus.” He calls. 

Kallus lets go of all but Zeb’s hands before reluctantly moving to pick up the items he’s dropped. 

“I’ll get those.” Zeb says as Pryce tries to take another jab at Ryder.

“Thank you.” Kallus says, Heart sinking as he remembers that the cuffs are among them. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Getting inside the dome is fairly easy, as is priming the thrusters and initiating protocol 13. Zeb hovers over Kallus’s every move which could have been mistaken for mistrust if he hadn’t been trying to touch and not just look. It all goes down hill when Thrawn returns and opens fire on the city. 

Letting ezra give himself up wasn’t easy. But they still have a job to do down here.  Once the reactor is on they’ll have a chance of holding out until Ezra makes his next move. Regardless, being stuck inside the compound with all of Lothals occupying force is less than ideal. Unless something monumental about their situation changes, none of them will walk out of here alive.

Zeb grips Kallus’s hand as they wait for the door of the reactor chamber to open. This is their first step and they’ll take the next if they get to it.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Even with the bridge extended We’re going to have to do something drastic.”

“Alright, I’ll do it!” Zeb says.

“Zeb, Don’t!” Kallus wonders if somehow he had missunderstood. Or if Zeb has been planning to fling himself at the enemy for a while now. 

“He’s crazy!” Gregor yells.

“Well it was your idea.” Kallus gripes. There is no time to worry about Zeb and no way Kallus can successfully replicate that acrobatic stunt to follow him“Come on.”

They work quickly both of them heads down at the terminals. It is a mistake.When Gregor takes a hit he only shoves Kallus away. It is suddenly very real that they might lose this fight. Or win it at to high a cost.

“Get that shield up” is Gregor’s only instruction.

Zeb has yet to climb out of the energy coils. But Kallus knows each moment he waits is another that Thrawn could use to make Lothal city pay for their rebellion. That for many, they have already lost, there was already damage that could not be undone. 

“Zeb?!” Kallus yells anyway. It’s selfish, he knows. 

“Don’t wait on me!”

He brings the reactor online.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Zeb manages to pull himself up just as the coils are powering up. Kallus hugs him tightly for the third time today and they race to the command center, jamming the doors to the reactor closed behind them. 

Upstairs it’s madness, an army of purgil have latched onto Thrawn’s ship and are flashing wildly in preparation for a hyperspace jump. Zeb is drawn forward and Kallus lets him climb the stairs to watch the mayhem. Hera and Sabine urge Ezra to get out but in a flash the purgil are gone. 

“Um, was that the plan?” Wolf’s voice sounds over the com, breaking the silence that has fallen in the star destroyer’s absence. “Because we’re all clear up here.” Everyone takes a second to come back to the reality. Had they won? This didn’t feel like winning. It wasn’t over.

“You heard Ezra let’s finish this!” Sabine says. She takes charge like she’s born for it. Hera couldn’t look more proud. 

They prime the thrusters just in time. The door blows, filling the command center with smoke and troopers. They get out on the roof for pick up. They have won.

But Ezra’s message feels hollow in Zeb’s ears. First Kannan, now the kid. Zeb doesn’t give a kriff about the top bunk or how annoying of a roommate Ezra could be. It’s strange to be on the ghost without him, feels less like home. But at least they’d won, right? But does that mean this is over? Zeb can’t lie to himself. He knew that their little family would have to be split sooner or later. Just, not like this. 

He keys the door to their bunk. It’s going to be empty. It feels almost wrong to go in.

Only it’s not.

\----

“Figures I’d find you here. Could say your kinda obsessed with me.” Zeb says puffing out his chest. “Chasing me  down, Following me into all this mess.”

“I’d follow you anywhere.” Kallus is surprised at his own bluntness. Gone are all the sweet written words and the rushed embrace doesn’t feel right either. He shouldn’t be shocked. It’s always been this need, underneath. Zeb looks just as scared and Kallus tries to take it back “I mean your skills as a leader have obviously improved on this mission.”

Zeb’s face softens a smirk playing at the corners of his lips. “Well, I didn’t have to lead you to my bed.” He crosses his arms, and leans against the door frame. Studying Kallus’s schooled blank expression despite the red blooming across his face. Kallus can’t believe, he feels suddenly like an intruder or worse just a body to warm Zeb bunk. Zeb looks away uncertain if he’s just made a mistake, to Kallus his shyness looks like indifference. 

 

Eyes averted, Zeb slowly begins spots things that aren’t his or Ezra’s lying around the cabin.

_ Has Kallus been living here? _

“Yes, well your smell was enough to do that.” Kallus says back standing hastily. He shifts his weight trying to decide if he can get around Zeb’s bulk blocking the door. Why does this feel like they are back at square one? The last time they were on the ghost they had ended up necking and grinding against each other in one of the gun turrets. Maybe the desperation has just fizzled out. Maybe Kallus doesn’t feel the same any more. 

Zeb can’t stand the thought.  _ I’d follow you anywhere.  _ It’s such a long way from  _ I’ll take my chances. _

“Say it again.” He demands.

“You smell.” Kallus says teeth grinding, stepping in closer. Kriff that’s not what he meant. Zeb isn’t trying to start a fight.

“No, the other thing.” Zeb sighs.

“You’re a great leader?” Kallus shakes his head “What you want me to stroke your ego if I wont stroke your…”

“No! Karabast! I’m not trying to keep you here. I mean I’d love it if you’d stay. But, did you mean it? About following me?”

“Yes, you kriffing idiot. But you looked like your eyes were going to pop out of your head!”

“My eyes are always popped out of my head, what is that supposed to mean?!”

“That I thought I’d scared you off with my kriffing generic love confession.”

“No! say it again. I’ll try to keep my eyes right where they are.” Zeb says staring intently, his hands resting on Kallus’s shoulders.

“I’d follow you anywhere.”

“I want you always by my side.” Zeb breaths, Cupping Kallus’s face in his hands. Kallus chuckles.

“This is all very romantic but I think sometimes, Zeb, I’m going to need to be under you or inside your thighs.”

“Is sometime right kriffing now?”

“Yes.”

There are no light years or galactic powers between them. No pressing missions and soon no annoying clothes. They will spend their first few years together preparing for a battle that will never dare to claim either of them, this happiness they’ve struggled for. 

When the time comes Zeb won’t tell him where they are going. But knows he is going with Zeb and that is enough. Opening his eyes to look at Lyra San for the first time is like seeing the glimmering light of the meteor all over again.  Kallus doesn’t deserve or understand the warmth that has been given to him. It is enough to know that Zeb is the one who gives it and that the hope and comfort of it’s light is not for his sake alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you every one who has stuck with this series! It's been fun. Just letting you all know that I am not currently planning any more works for this pair. I am going to be starting my first real career job soon and I am currently just really feeling a different fandom. Thanks again for all your love and support!

**Author's Note:**

> Woo! I'm writing again. 
> 
> Find me on tumblr @brorifles because I make art too!


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